Poop Cannons - Avoiding the Blowout
Babies are adorable precious bundles of joy.
They are also Poop Cannons.
I learned this a few weeks after my daughter was born. My wife and I had established an overnight routine that distributed the sleep deprivation in a way that we felt was fair. Brutal, but fair.
1 - Baby wakes up, Daddy grabs her from the co-sleeper and changes her diaper. Sometimes this is a quick and easy process, sometimes much more involved (more later)
2 - Daddy drops off a clean, dry hungry baby with Momma and Momma feeds the baby.
3 - If the feeding goes smoothly and the burp comes quick... baby down and everyone sleeps. If things go sideways or Baby isn't going to sleep right away, Momma passes off to Daddy who burps / walks / bounces the baby until sleep.
4 - Close eyes.
5 - If it is dawn, go to work. Otherwise, rinse and repeat.
Now, sometimes the diaper changes were more involved than others. After one particularly gnarly diaper, Baby was clean and the dirty diaper was wrapped around several dirty wipes and wedged under darling Baby's butt to stay contained while I put on a new one. I bent down to get the new diaper from the stacker and I heard, felt and smelled my first Poop Cannon.
My precious little angel had launched a fusillade of poop past my head close enough that I could feel the whiff.
The dirty diaper and wipes propped under her butt had created a near-perfect launch angle of about 45 degrees. The aftermath was an arc of poo that first made contact with one sliding closet door and continued to rise upwards before traversing to the second closet door. The arc completed its journey on the floor, at least 4 feet from the point of origin.
I was so sleep deprived I'm not exactly sure what happened afterwards. I remember laughing. I know that I got the baby cleaned and delivered to Momma and I know that I managed to clean up the poo. But the combined trauma and exhaustion mean I'm blissfully amnestic as to the nitty gritty details.
The Poop Cannon Incident was an eye-opener in that I was made aware of just how much volume and pressure could be produced by a baby's GI system. This knowledge led me the blowout-free diaper change technique.
People want things to fit properly and so when we put a diaper on a baby, we seat the crotch of the diaper over the crotch of the baby and bring the tabs around and seal things shut. Comfy, cozy, nice and snug. But what happens when the Cannon fires? All that volume. All that pressure. In a confined space?
It has to go somewhere... the pressure must be released. Most often, that pressure is funneled between the cheeks and released up the back of the baby. Poop in the onesie, poop in the jammies, poop all over their back and occasionally poop in their hair. But it's not just them, you've got poop on your hands from picking them up. The crib needs to be changed. The changing table isn't going to stay clean. It's a nightmare.
So how do you avoid it?
Instead of placing the diapers snugly around the crotch. Set the waist of the diaper at the waist of the baby. This should created a pocket of air in the crotch that can handle the onslaught and prevent blowouts. Make sure you don't obliterate your hard work by cramming a too-small onesie over the well-placed diaper and eliminating your 'breathing room'.
This is the single greatest piece of advice I could ever pass on to a new parent. Spread the word.
They are also Poop Cannons.
I learned this a few weeks after my daughter was born. My wife and I had established an overnight routine that distributed the sleep deprivation in a way that we felt was fair. Brutal, but fair.
1 - Baby wakes up, Daddy grabs her from the co-sleeper and changes her diaper. Sometimes this is a quick and easy process, sometimes much more involved (more later)
2 - Daddy drops off a clean, dry hungry baby with Momma and Momma feeds the baby.
3 - If the feeding goes smoothly and the burp comes quick... baby down and everyone sleeps. If things go sideways or Baby isn't going to sleep right away, Momma passes off to Daddy who burps / walks / bounces the baby until sleep.
4 - Close eyes.
5 - If it is dawn, go to work. Otherwise, rinse and repeat.
Now, sometimes the diaper changes were more involved than others. After one particularly gnarly diaper, Baby was clean and the dirty diaper was wrapped around several dirty wipes and wedged under darling Baby's butt to stay contained while I put on a new one. I bent down to get the new diaper from the stacker and I heard, felt and smelled my first Poop Cannon.
My precious little angel had launched a fusillade of poop past my head close enough that I could feel the whiff.
The dirty diaper and wipes propped under her butt had created a near-perfect launch angle of about 45 degrees. The aftermath was an arc of poo that first made contact with one sliding closet door and continued to rise upwards before traversing to the second closet door. The arc completed its journey on the floor, at least 4 feet from the point of origin.
I was so sleep deprived I'm not exactly sure what happened afterwards. I remember laughing. I know that I got the baby cleaned and delivered to Momma and I know that I managed to clean up the poo. But the combined trauma and exhaustion mean I'm blissfully amnestic as to the nitty gritty details.
The Poop Cannon Incident was an eye-opener in that I was made aware of just how much volume and pressure could be produced by a baby's GI system. This knowledge led me the blowout-free diaper change technique.
People want things to fit properly and so when we put a diaper on a baby, we seat the crotch of the diaper over the crotch of the baby and bring the tabs around and seal things shut. Comfy, cozy, nice and snug. But what happens when the Cannon fires? All that volume. All that pressure. In a confined space?
It has to go somewhere... the pressure must be released. Most often, that pressure is funneled between the cheeks and released up the back of the baby. Poop in the onesie, poop in the jammies, poop all over their back and occasionally poop in their hair. But it's not just them, you've got poop on your hands from picking them up. The crib needs to be changed. The changing table isn't going to stay clean. It's a nightmare.
So how do you avoid it?
Instead of placing the diapers snugly around the crotch. Set the waist of the diaper at the waist of the baby. This should created a pocket of air in the crotch that can handle the onslaught and prevent blowouts. Make sure you don't obliterate your hard work by cramming a too-small onesie over the well-placed diaper and eliminating your 'breathing room'.
This is the single greatest piece of advice I could ever pass on to a new parent. Spread the word.
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